What's it all about?

Fast approaching 30 I've fallen in to teaching, a career though championed by many amongst my friends and family, I've tried desperately to avoid. Worse still I appear to have missed the heyday when students were keen and wages were plenty. Having left city-life behind to support my partner through a prolonged recovery from cancer, it's clear I've become isolated, not only from my old life, but from the future I hoped it would lead to...

There must be more to life than this..?

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Non-Moan no.1 (Week 4)

Procrastination is the thief of time!!!
I’ve noticed recently, say over the past year or so, that I have begun to procrastinate more than ever before. If I’m honest I was always one of those children who, when asked to do something was constantly poised ready to utter the phrase ‘I’ll do it in a minute’, a phrase which endlessly tormented my parents.
I suppose I’ve rarely taken solace in the immortal words of Thomas Jefferson ‘Never put off till tomorrow, what you can do today.’ Now however I feel I’m taking this new habit to extremes.
It takes me exactly seven minutes to drive to work from my home. I often find myself lying in bed until 8:20am when I’m due in the classroom at 9am to teach.  If I jump straight in the shower, I can be out, dried and starting to get dressed within fifteen minutes of getting out of bed meaning that I actually arrive at work with a decent ten minutes to spare.  (You can probably tell this is a skill I’ve been honing...)
And it’s not just getting up in the mornings. Teachers inevitably have a large amount of marking to do, I find myself leaving this until the day I should really be giving it back to pupils! Not unlike many of my students who leave their work until the last minute if they do it at all! The very students I moan about.
Now though I was a procrastinator as a child at home, in school I was always a high achiever.  Somehow between childhood and becoming an adult, I’ve become one of those people who coasts. I barely meet deadlines, I pray for snow days and I constantly look for excuses to explain my sheer laziness when it comes to my job.
In short I’ve realised what the problem is. Nobody likes to do things they don’t want to do. They just don’t, it’s horrible. So instead I put everything off until the last minute and as such end up stressing myself out and running about like a headless chicken.
It all boils down to the fact that I just can’t be bothered. And here’s the worst bit. This breakthrough (though it may seem obvious to some) has made me realise that I’ve never had to do things that I didn’t want to do. I’ve been spoilt. And now when my family require that little bit of effort from me, I struggle.
How silly is that? (Never thought I’d end up non-moaning about myself!) So I’m hoping that this revelation will allow me to mature a little (Mentally, possibly even spiritually, but not physically... Please remember I’m still in my twenties) and get past this ridiculously selfish, and immature ‘virtue’ that I seem to have acquired.
I swear, my headstone will one day read ‘Here lies Drew, Full of Good Intentions’.
Am I alone in this wasting of time? If not get in touch... I’ll get round to replying... eventually...


Belle said...

Great post, and I love your headstone. This is what I do in order to get things done that I hate doing; I do 1/4 of it and then reward myself with something (playing a video game, reading, blogging) for an hour. Then I do another 1/4 or 1/2 of the crappy thing and then reward myself etc. It works for me.

Drew Benn said...

Ah yes, the reward system! I use this one myself! Frequently! hehe. Sometimes I even sit staring when something needs to be done, counting in my head thinking 'when I get to 10 I'll move', that rarely works too!

Glad I'm not alone though :)

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